The Black Dahlia (2006)

Originally Reviewed 

Monday January 15, 2007

Once again another Scarlett Johansson film that I can't even make it through due to utter boredom.  But fortunately on this occasion the fact that The Black Dahlia is completely unwatchable isn't her fault... it's horrible all on it's own.

The Black Dahlia is a film based on a book, which is "based" on an actual murder case back in the 1940's in Los Angeles which to this day has never been solved. The murder involved a young girl named Elizabeth Short whose attempt at breaking into show business ultimately led to her gruesome murder, and left behind a lot of unanswered questions. Other than the unsolved murder case being the basis for this film everything else surrounding the story is completely made up. Watch the ten minute special feature segment on the DVD, which is better than the film itself, it breaks down the fact and fiction of this interpretation and you'll discover that this film is basically the imagination of the writer of the book.

I'll be honest I only made it through half of this, the story was too extremely dull and slow moving for me sit through. Usually I give a film 15-20 minutes to present something to hold my interest before ultimately calling it quits, but I was quite lenient with this one. After an hour I gave up, the story was going nowhere and I was confused from the beginning as to what exactly was going on. I didn't get the one officer's insane emotional attachment to this case and everything else in the film seemed to branch off on multiple tangents. The ending was simply ridiculous and I felt a little cheated that the writer was making up a ending to try and explain an actual murder.  Why bother making a film about a real case and make 99% of it?  It's a crime against viewers who are watching it thinking it's somewhat based on actual events.

The Black Dahlia had huge potential, but failed on almost every level. First off the style of this film was all wrong. They tried to turn this into an recreation of a 1940's crime thriller, with the corny lines and lead character narration. This may have worked in the 40's but now a days its not going to satisfy a whole lot of people, and frankly I would rather watch the real thing than an even poorer imitation. Second, the casting was horrible. Josh Hartnett is a terrible actor, he almost makes Ben Affleck look good. Where this guy came from and who thinks he has any talent is beyond me, but giving him the lead role in this or any other serious film is a mistake. Of course if you’re going to do something wrong you might as well go all the way and Scarlett Johansson as the co-star was a perfect choice to compliment Hartnett's attempt at acting.

Third, the story is poorly written. From the start  I was confused, and as it progressed it only got worse. Most of the film is made up of a lot of mindless chatter which half the time doesn't appear to even make sense to the actors themselves. The scene that really ended it for me is when Hartnett's character goes over to Hilary Swank's home and has dinner with her absurd family.  Swank's drunk mother does an insane rambling about the red light district and it was so awful that I gave up hope for the remainder of the story. 

Overall, The Black Dahlia takes an unsolved murder case and "butchers" it even more, excuse the pun. It's a film that should have had no decisive ending because in all reality it has none.  Had the meat of the film been entertaining, leaving the audience hanging would not have been a bad thing to do.  Instead the viewer is subject to two hours of drivel that isn't true only to be fed a very mediocre fake ending. I have no problem with fiction but I do have a problem when someone attempts to promote a film on the premise that it's based on true events when about 1% of it is true.

In the end, if you want a good crime film, watch L.A. Confidential, that's how you correctly do a crime thriller whether it's based on true events or not. Had The Black Dahlia taken some pages out of that book then you would have seen a good film. Personally I find The Black Dahlia mystery to be quite intriguing and if properly done and actually based off real case evidence, instead of a fictional book, it might have turned out better. But after it's all said and done the filming, the casting, and the story ultimately leaves you quite disappointed. 

2/10